Happily Ever After Doesn't Happen by Accident
by Dr. Dan Woodward
Dan Woodward is the pastor of First Baptist Church of Dwight, Illinois and co-founder of Midwest Christian Boys Football Camp.
I live with some thoughts of my past as a young man, and I’m about to tell some stories I have never told publicly. I’m not proud of them. The only reason I am telling them is to be a warning. For some of you who are older teens and have younger brother and sisters and you need to help them. Some of you may have thoughts of rebellion and aren’t happy in your situation in life.
But the title I want to speak to you about is this: “Happily Ever After Doesn’t Happen by Accident.” “Happily Ever After Doesn’t Happen by Accident.” Turn to Ephesians 6:1-3. Some of you turn the preacher off as soon as we mention this verse. We read it and you immediately give me the, “Stop. Don’t. That verse isn’t really in the Bible. It can’t mean what it says.” But it is in the Bible and God put it in the Bible for a purpose and I want you to get it. Maybe the reason you don’t like it is because the word ‘children’ is there and you don’t want to be considered a child. But you’ve got to remember what God calls us. We’re each His child, and you’re always a child to Him no matter how old you get, so don’t worry about it.
Look at Ephesians 6 and verse one. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.” (Ephesians 6:1-3) Listen to me, two of the hardest words for me when I was growing up were ‘obey’ and ‘honor.’ I had a very hard time obeying. Listen to me, when you can’t obey, then there is no giving honor to your parents because one produces the other. So the question to you right now is ‘How do we produce honor toward our parents?’
Listen to me, you will live your life in one of two ways, you’ll live it either with thankfulness or regret. You’ll live your life in such a way that you’ll be grieving and sad, saying, “Would God I had! I wish I had done that right, I wish I would have done that differently, I wish I would have said that differently.” Or you’ll live with an ending that says, “Thank God I did! I am so thankful I did that.” That’s where happily ever after happens.
I’m so thankful that I had the opportunity to get things right with my parents and have a great relationship with them. As a young boy, I broke my parent’s hearts. My dad was a truck driver and he was gone, I had five sisters and I was the only boy. (I also have three daughters, so I have lived my entire life in a girls’ dormitory waiting for the bathroom! When I built our new house I built my own bathroom so I wouldn’t have to wait again. Then they all moved out except for my wife.
But as a young man I ran away from home. I had heard you could join the circus and travel with the circus. When I ran away there was a circus in town and I went and said, “I want to run away with you guys.” They said, “You cannot run away with us.” So that was not an option to run away and be in the circus, although I’ve been a part of a circus for all these years.
When I ran away there was a friend of mine who lived on a farm with his parents. They had a barn and in the barn was a hay loft. Above the hay loft was an attic where they use to store the hooks you would grab the hay and there was a rail that you would slide them in and go down and pick the hay up. Anyways I ran away and lived up there and would only come out at night when no one could see you or find you. I was gone for two weeks. I’m not proud of that. I have deep regret for hurting my parents as I look back and relive the horror I put my parents through. My mom and dad probably thought I was dead somewhere, they gave up searching or me, and again I wish I could go back and erase that story. I’m not putting myself in a very good light but this was a prodigal rebellion of childhood. I wish I could have done it over and change the story.
Please don’t miss what I’m saying. Later I would leave home at age 17 because I didn’t want anyone telling me what to do. I rented a home, actually a farm. I looked older, I had a beard and long hair. I was a prodigal. I rented a farm at age 17 but then I found out you had to pay the electric bill -- the audacity that someone would tell me I had to pay my electric bill! Then we had diesel fuel for oil to heat the farmhouse and they had to deliver it and to think they would want me to pay for that oil! “I can’t believe it.”
I thought I would leave home and nobody would tell me what to do. Hello young people! Then I went into the Army because I didn’t want anybody telling me what to do. Are you gathering, I was not such a smart young man and insisted on learning everything the hard way?
I remember getting off the bus, I had long hair. I remember them saying, “We’re going down to get hair cuts.” I was the first one in line. They said.. “How do you want it cut?” I said, “Oh, just a little off the side would be fine.” Five swipes later it was all gone and I spent the next three months rubbing my head, I couldn’t believe it! Now I’ve been rubbing my head every day, still wondering what happened to it. I’m excited I’ve got one hair that sticks straight up and I’m keeping it in good shape so I don’t lose it.
But listen to me, how do you avoid prodigalism and bring honor to your parents? How do you avoid a wasted life? Now let me say this about prodigals, there is only one story about a prodigal in the Bible. Don’t think you can go out today and be a prodigal because Brother Woodward turned out alright in the end and things turned out fine for him. Let me tell you about how many prodigals never came back, never graced the doors of the church again. I believe I came back because I had a praying mom and a praying dad. They prayed and wept and begged God and would not give up on me.
My dad told me this story. “I’m driving a truck praying for my son, I’m gripping the wheel crying and praying so hard that God would do something to bring my son back home. I had to pull the truck over for fear of crashing.” I so deeply regret that I’m the one who put them through that heartache. Listen young people there is no magic eraser. It still haunts me to this day.
How do we avoid prodigalism and a wasted life? Don’t miss it, its not hard. Number one, trust the Word of God. Trust the Word of God. His Word can be trusted, henceforth I can trust God. I can Trust God! Why can God be trusted? There are four things very quickly.
1. He can be trusted because of His OMNIPRESENCE, He’s everywhere.
2. He can be trusted because of His OMNISCIENCE, He’s all knowing.
3. He can be trusted because He’s OMNIPOTENT, He’s all-powerful.
4. He can be trusted because of GOD’S LOVE, His love for mankind, and His love for you and me.
God gives us four conclusions for our future, but we must choose, the choice is mine. You know the beautiful thing for me about the Christian life is when I finally came to myself, I have a free choice to live for God, I have a free choice to honor my parents, I have a free choice to obey them, I have free choice to follow the God who loves me. If I trust God and His plan for my life, everything changes.
Oh, listen to me, first of all I can trust Him because of His omnipresence, He’s everywhere. In other words, God knows what is best for me and He always does what’s right. You know, God doesn’t look down from Heaven and say, “Uh-oh, I didn’t think that was going to happen.” He already knows. Hello? My Bible says, “But he knoweth the way that I take:...” (Job 23:10)
Number two. Because of His omniscience, He’s all knowing, He knows what’s going on with me all the time, He knows what I’m going through, He knows my every heartache, He knows what I need to grow in the Lord.
As a young man, I wish I had known this. You know, I had five sisters, my dad was gone driving truck, and I was frustrated with my dad being gone. My sisters were wonderful, they were a blessing to me. My mother was wonderful. But I missed my dad. That’s just excuses, and they don’t amount to anything, but I was frustrated.
You might be here and not have a dad or a mom, and you know I should have been thanking God for my parents. Years ago I asked Loretta Walker, “Loretta, how did you make it? Your dad died when you were young, his life was consumed with drinking.”
She said, “It was a great day when I realized that God is my Father. I have a perfect Father in Heaven.” There is a Father up above who is looking down with love. Don’t miss it young people. We’re going to be without excuses one day. We have a lot of people making excuses why they can’t do this, why they can’t do that. But I never had a convention or youth conference where I could go where a preacher says, “Hey! God cares. Here’s some real truth you can grab onto. God has a plan, and He has a reason for what you’re going through right now.”
Teenager, you can trust Him. He knows what’s best, and that’s what He wants for you. I can trust God because He is omnipotent, all-powerful. He will always do what is best for you, always, always. I can have confidence that in all the days of my life -- the best days and the worst days -- He’s going to do what is best for me.
Even when things don’t go the way we think they should go... Maybe a tragedy comes into your life or a heartache or disappointment, and our happily ever after hasn’t happened like we thought our happily ever after should turn out. We could be like Job, “…the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.” (Job 1:21) Listen to me young people, if you can grab on to one truth when things don’t go the way you think they should go, let it be that one. “Blessed be the name of the LORD.”
Fourthly, because of My heavenly Father’s love for me, He wants what is best for me. “We love him, because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19) He loved me before I ever knew that He loved me. If I just could have grabbed hold of that when I was young, I would never have been a prodigal. I would never have broken my parents’ hearts. I’m not proud of that; that’s a stain upon my heart and soul that I have. I thought I could make my own decisions, and that I knew better. But in reality, I made everything worse for myself and everyone in my life by those bad decisions. Oh, how I wish I had trusted in God instead, trusted in His omniscience, His omnipotence, His omnipresence, and His love for me.
God knows and God cares. “For the love of Christ constraineth us; because we thus judge, that if one died for all, then were all dead: And that he died for all, that they which live should not henceforth live unto themselves, but unto him which died for them, and rose again. Wherefore henceforth know we no man after the flesh: yea, though we have known Christ after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we him no more. Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation; To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation. Now then we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God did beseech you by us: we pray you in Christ’s stead, be ye reconciled to God.” (II Corinthians 5:14-20)
We are ambassadors. An ambassador represents another country, their homeland, place of their birth. Are you representing your country which is the kingdom of Heaven? Are you a good ambassador in your home, with your family? Am I a good ambassador when it comes to my relationship with God? Understand this, as an ambassador if I disagree with God, He’s right and I’m always wrong. It’s that simple. An ambassador is often there to represent our country’s President. There were some crazy ambassadors during the Trump era that got fired because they didn’t represent the President well. They didn’t represent our country truthfully, and what was going on. I wonder how many of us are poor representations of the kingdom of God? “Well, I’m young.” No, you have a great opportunity and your whole life is ahead of you. Don’t miss it.
We’re 70 miles south of Chicago Midway airport. It was Monday morning I was outside and I saw a Southwest jet fly over my house low enough that I could recognize the red tail part. That’s how long and low his approach was. That’s a long 70-mile approach coming in. I’ve flown over Dwight, Illinois and could see I-55, but I could never get into position to see my home yet from the sky. We’ve got a long approach going on so hang on!
Number three. I must be willing to do my part as a child of God when it comes to my God-given parents. What is your part? My part according to scripture is where we started. My part is to honor and obey, to look for opportunities to honor my parents. I live with missed opportunity, I live with that, what I did wrong in my younger years. Now I made a commitment after I got right with God that I would never break my mom and dad’s heart again, never ever, and I did my best to be a blessing to my mom and dad from then on.
My dad’s in Heaven now. My dad liked to eat. I’m a foodie, as you can tell. Sometimes I would eat something really good, and I would call my dad and say, “Dad, you won’t believe what I just ate, it was fabulous.” The other day I ate at a place that was really nice and the food was exceptional. I thought, “Man, I need to call my dad, we need to come back here.” Then I realized, “Oh he already knows. He’s been watching, he knows.” But those opportunities are over. I can’t call him anymore.
Young people, some of that is coming for you one day, its going to come to your home where Dad’s not going to be there or Mom’s not going to be there. I need to look for opportunities while it is yet today, opportunities to enjoy them, to be together, to build this relationship with them. Hey I have to look for acts of kindness and things that would be a help and blessing to them. Now there is a warning label with kindness. Be careful showing kindness to your parents because they may pass out and fall and bump their heads because they’ve never seen that out of you before!
Proverbs 31:26 says, “She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.” By the way, that’s not just for women, its for everyone. Ephesians 4:32 says, “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” I wonder, does the law of kindness live in your heart?
I have a way I can identify when someone has a kind spirit, by how they treat animals, how they act towards animals. I can tell when a boy is going to have a hard time in life if he’s mean to an animal. I grew up on a farm milking cows when I was very young, and I have a real love for animals and trained dogs. There’s this law of kindness. Anybody can be kind to a dog. Have you ever thought why dogs are called a man’s best friend? You would think in a husband wife situation the wife would be, and my wife is my best friend. When I say man’s best friend you’ve heard that saying for so long, you automatically think of a dog. Do you know why?
There’s reasons. I’ve thought about this stuff. A dog doesn’t mind if you use its shampoo, he doesn’t care it doesn’t bother him. A dog never asks for directions, there’s an instinct there and he knows where he’s going. A dog doesn’t mind if you leave your stuff around, in fact, the more you lay it around the better he likes it. A dog never gets upset when you bring your friends over, he gets all excited and jumps up and down and jumps on them. You never have to wonder where your dog is, you just chain him to the house.
Now getting back to kindness, young people look for acts of kindness you can do to be a blessing to your mom and dad who have invested so much of themselves in your life. First off, obey them and honor them and don’t be a heartbreak to them. But look for those opportunities of things that would mean a lot to them. Honor your parents. A note, a card, a letter.
Always obey with gladness. This is where you win big points, always obey with gladness. Respond with gladness and a smile when you’re asked to do something. I trained my girls with this statement. When I would ask them to do something, they would have to respond with, “I’ll be glad to!” When I first taught this they would say, “I’LL BE GLAD TOO!” and I would say, “No, no, no. That’s sarcastic” “I’d be glad to.” Ruth Ann was the biggest offender of this, and of course some of it was teasing and horsing around. “I’d be glad to.” I would say “No, no, that’s being a smart-aleck. That’s not right, so say it again.” She had about 30 different ways she would say it. Finally it would come out, “Dad, I would be glad to.” It became a way of life in our home with our girls.
By the way young people, when you have a glad surrender in your heart, then things go much better when you have needs and wants. When you say, “Dad, do you have five bucks?” Seriously, if I’m mad at you then don’t come asking for money, absolutely not! A glad surrender.
Do you understand that one day you will reap what you have sown? Young people, I went to the altar before I had kids and said, “Oh, God forgive me for the way I once acted towards my mom and dad, I don’t want to reap what I’ve sown. Oh God, help me and please forgive me for all their heartache and hurt. Oh, God help me.” Young people, I’m not kidding you. I was afraid I would reap all that, and I would have but for the mercy and forgiveness of God. I confessed my sins at the altar and I haven’t reaped one thing with my girls. They are serving the Lord, thank God.
But the Bible says you will reap what you sow. Not only will you reap what you sow, you will reap more than what you sow. You plant one kernel of corn and you’ll get a whole ear of corn, a whole stalk of ears, its amazing. Not only that, when you plant corn, you don’t get potatoes, you get corn. You don’t plant corn and get tomatoes. You get corn. Disobedience planted, what do you get? Disobedience. You plant smart-aleck attitude and rebellion and what do you get? Smart-aleck rebellion. Not only do you get it back, but you get more.
Don’t miss what I’m saying. There needs to be a glad surrender in your obedience. Not just going through the motions with a poor attitude.
We hear about rebel radar. Rebels have a way of finding each other at camp, at youth activity, at church. I’ve seen it. I was a rebel and I could spot another rebel and gravitate in their direction. I’ve raised horses. Two horses could be put in a pen together for less than an hour and then you try to separate them and they go nuts, like they’ve been friends forever.
But there needs to be a radar set to have mom and dad on the radar. When they call, “Danny!” I don’t yell and say, “What do you want?” No, I go running because they’re on my radar, and ask, “Mom and Dad, what do you need?” I respond to their voice. I hear them and ask, “What can I do for you?” Instead of yelling and asking what they want, instead of saying, “I’m busy, don’t you know I’m busy?” Shame on some of you. When you’ve got mom and dad on the radar it ought to be tuned in to them all the time. No matter what I’m doing, even if I’m busy and it may be an inconvenience at the moment, but boy life is a lot better now that I’ve got mom and dad on the radar.
I learned a lot following my dad around and helping him. I learned about wrenches and tools and how to do things. I’m a mechanic, you wouldn’t believe all the projects I work on and some of the things I do. I would like some of you to keep up with me and all I’ve got going on. But I learned so much of it from my dad. My dad would say, “Go get me a 3/16” or “Go get me a 5/8” and I learned all that.
My mom was a circulating nurse for surgery. The doctor would ask for something and they would hand it to him. Well we would circulate, too. When we work on a vehicle somebody runs to help and to find things so the guy underneath doesn’t have to come out. We get more done working on buses because we have somebody that’s circulating. But how about this radar? Staying in tune with what mom and dad need, looking for an opportunity to be a help and a blessing.
Then think about this, keep your heart thankful. That’s why the Bible says, “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” (I Thessalonians 5:18) Even when they have to say no, keep a good attitude and a thankful heart. “Hey can I...?” “No? Well, thank you anyways.”
No means no. My dad knew body language, my dad was pretty tough. So when I would talk to him I would be careful to make sure my eyes weren’t moving or rolling or doing nothing. I would look him in the eye and say, “Yes sir.”
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.” (Ephesians 6:1-3) Think about this, verse three “That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.” My dad, sometimes when I did something bad he would say, “Son, you’re going to die or you’re going to wish you were dead.” Do you want blessings for your future and long life? The Bible says it’s connected to your relationship with Mom and Dad.
Listen, is it well with thee? Is it well with thee? Last thing and I am done. Make a covenant not to break your mom and dad’s heart. Start today. I’m going to make a covenant, a promise. Listen to me, “Happily Ever After Doesn’t Happen by Accident.” My parents prayed for me, and that’s probably what saved my life and gave me another chance. I put together a plan when I got right with God, a plan to be a blessing to my parents, a plan that I’m going to start obeying the first time. I’m going to look for opportunities to honor them and show my love for them. I’m not going to break my mom and dad’s heart. I’m going to keep them on the radar.
Happily ever after doesn’t happen by accident.
But the title I want to speak to you about is this: “Happily Ever After Doesn’t Happen by Accident.” “Happily Ever After Doesn’t Happen by Accident.” Turn to Ephesians 6:1-3. Some of you turn the preacher off as soon as we mention this verse. We read it and you immediately give me the, “Stop. Don’t. That verse isn’t really in the Bible. It can’t mean what it says.” But it is in the Bible and God put it in the Bible for a purpose and I want you to get it. Maybe the reason you don’t like it is because the word ‘children’ is there and you don’t want to be considered a child. But you’ve got to remember what God calls us. We’re each His child, and you’re always a child to Him no matter how old you get, so don’t worry about it.
Look at Ephesians 6 and verse one. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.” (Ephesians 6:1-3) Listen to me, two of the hardest words for me when I was growing up were ‘obey’ and ‘honor.’ I had a very hard time obeying. Listen to me, when you can’t obey, then there is no giving honor to your parents because one produces the other. So the question to you right now is ‘How do we produce honor toward our parents?’
Listen to me, you will live your life in one of two ways, you’ll live it either with thankfulness or regret. You’ll live your life in such a way that you’ll be grieving and sad, saying, “Would God I had! I wish I had done that right, I wish I would have done that differently, I wish I would have said that differently.” Or you’ll live with an ending that says, “Thank God I did! I am so thankful I did that.” That’s where happily ever after happens.
I’m so thankful that I had the opportunity to get things right with my parents and have a great relationship with them. As a young boy, I broke my parent’s hearts. My dad was a truck driver and he was gone, I had five sisters and I was the only boy. (I also have three daughters, so I have lived my entire life in a girls’ dormitory waiting for the bathroom! When I built our new house I built my own bathroom so I wouldn’t have to wait again. Then they all moved out except for my wife.
But as a young man I ran away from home. I had heard you could join the circus and travel with the circus. When I ran away there was a circus in town and I went and said, “I want to run away with you guys.” They said, “You cannot run away with us.” So that was not an option to run away and be in the circus, although I’ve been a part of a circus for all these years.
When I ran away there was a friend of mine who lived on a farm with his parents. They had a barn and in the barn was a hay loft. Above the hay loft was an attic where they use to store the hooks you would grab the hay and there was a rail that you would slide them in and go down and pick the hay up. Anyways I ran away and lived up there and would only come out at night when no one could see you or find you. I was gone for two weeks. I’m not proud of that. I have deep regret for hurting my parents as I look back and relive the horror I put my parents through. My mom and dad probably thought I was dead somewhere, they gave up searching or me, and again I wish I could go back and erase that story. I’m not putting myself in a very good light but this was a prodigal rebellion of childhood. I wish I could have done it over and change the story.
Please don’t miss what I’m saying. Later I would leave home at age 17 because I didn’t want anyone telling me what to do. I rented a home, actually a farm. I looked older, I had a beard and long hair. I was a prodigal. I rented a farm at age 17 but then I found out you had to pay the electric bill -- the audacity that someone would tell me I had to pay my electric bill! Then we had diesel fuel for oil to heat the farmhouse and they had to deliver it and to think they would want me to pay for that oil! “I can’t believe it.”
I thought I would leave home and nobody would tell me what to do. Hello young people! Then I went into the Army because I didn’t want anybody telling me what to do. Are you gathering, I was not such a smart young man and insisted on learning everything the hard way?
I remember getting off the bus, I had long hair. I remember them saying, “We’re going down to get hair cuts.” I was the first one in line. They said.. “How do you want it cut?” I said, “Oh, just a little off the side would be fine.” Five swipes later it was all gone and I spent the next three months rubbing my head, I couldn’t believe it! Now I’ve been rubbing my head every day, still wondering what happened to it. I’m excited I’ve got one hair that sticks straight up and I’m keeping it in good shape so I don’t lose it.
But listen to me, how do you avoid prodigalism and bring honor to your parents? How do you avoid a wasted life? Now let me say this about prodigals, there is only one story about a prodigal in the Bible. Don’t think you can go out today and be a prodigal because Brother Woodward turned out alright in the end and things turned out fine for him. Let me tell you about how many prodigals never came back, never graced the doors of the church again. I believe I came back because I had a praying mom and a praying dad. They prayed and wept and begged God and would not give up on me.
My dad told me this story. “I’m driving a truck praying for my son, I’m gripping the wheel crying and praying so hard that God would do something to bring my son back home. I had to pull the truck over for fear of crashing.” I so deeply regret that I’m the one who put them through that heartache. Listen young people there is no magic eraser. It still haunts me to this day.
How do we avoid prodigalism and a wasted life? Don’t miss it, its not hard. Number one, trust the Word of God. Trust the Word of God. His Word can be trusted, henceforth I can trust God. I can Trust God! Why can God be trusted? There are four things very quickly.
1. He can be trusted because of His OMNIPRESENCE, He’s everywhere.
2. He can be trusted because of His OMNISCIENCE, He’s all knowing.
3. He can be trusted because He’s OMNIPOTENT, He’s all-powerful.
4. He can be trusted because of GOD’S LOVE, His love for mankind, and His love for you and me.
God gives us four conclusions for our future, but we must choose, the choice is mine. You know the beautiful thing for me about the Christian life is when I finally came to myself, I have a free choice to live for God, I have a free choice to honor my parents, I have a free choice to obey them, I have free choice to follow the God who loves me. If I trust God and His plan for my life, everything changes.
Oh, listen to me, first of all I can trust Him because of His omnipresence, He’s everywhere. In other words, God knows what is best for me and He always does what’s right. You know, God doesn’t look down from Heaven and say, “Uh-oh, I didn’t think that was going to happen.” He already knows. Hello? My Bible says, “But he knoweth the way that I take:...” (Job 23:10)
Number two. Because of His omniscience, He’s all knowing, He knows what’s going on with me all the time, He knows what I’m going through, He knows my every heartache, He knows what I need to grow in the Lord.
As a young man, I wish I had known this. You know, I had five sisters, my dad was gone driving truck, and I was frustrated with my dad being gone. My sisters were wonderful, they were a blessing to me. My mother was wonderful. But I missed my dad. That’s just excuses, and they don’t amount to anything, but I was frustrated.
You might be here and not have a dad or a mom, and you know I should have been thanking God for my parents. Years ago I asked Loretta Walker, “Loretta, how did you make it? Your dad died when you were young, his life was consumed with drinking.”
She said, “It was a great day when I realized that God is my Father. I have a perfect Father in Heaven.” There is a Father up above who is looking down with love. Don’t miss it young people. We’re going to be without excuses one day. We have a lot of people making excuses why they can’t do this, why they can’t do that. But I never had a convention or youth conference where I could go where a preacher says, “Hey! God cares. Here’s some real truth you can grab onto. God has a plan, and He has a reason for what you’re going through right now.”
Teenager, you can trust Him. He knows what’s best, and that’s what He wants for you. I can trust God because He is omnipotent, all-powerful. He will always do what is best for you, always, always. I can have confidence that in all the days of my life -- the best days and the worst days -- He’s going to do what is best for me.
Even when things don’t go the way we think they should go... Maybe a tragedy comes into your life or a heartache or disappointment, and our happily ever after hasn’t happened like we thought our happily ever after should turn out. We could be like Job, “…the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.” (Job 1:21) Listen to me young people, if you can grab on to one truth when things don’t go the way you think they should go, let it be that one. “Blessed be the name of the LORD.”
Fourthly, because of My heavenly Father’s love for me, He wants what is best for me. “We love him, because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19) He loved me before I ever knew that He loved me. If I just could have grabbed hold of that when I was young, I would never have been a prodigal. I would never have broken my parents’ hearts. I’m not proud of that; that’s a stain upon my heart and soul that I have. I thought I could make my own decisions, and that I knew better. But in reality, I made everything worse for myself and everyone in my life by those bad decisions. Oh, how I wish I had trusted in God instead, trusted in His omniscience, His omnipotence, His omnipresence, and His love for me.
God knows and God cares. “For the love of Christ constraineth us; because we thus judge, that if one died for all, then were all dead: And that he died for all, that they which live should not henceforth live unto themselves, but unto him which died for them, and rose again. Wherefore henceforth know we no man after the flesh: yea, though we have known Christ after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we him no more. Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation; To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation. Now then we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God did beseech you by us: we pray you in Christ’s stead, be ye reconciled to God.” (II Corinthians 5:14-20)
We are ambassadors. An ambassador represents another country, their homeland, place of their birth. Are you representing your country which is the kingdom of Heaven? Are you a good ambassador in your home, with your family? Am I a good ambassador when it comes to my relationship with God? Understand this, as an ambassador if I disagree with God, He’s right and I’m always wrong. It’s that simple. An ambassador is often there to represent our country’s President. There were some crazy ambassadors during the Trump era that got fired because they didn’t represent the President well. They didn’t represent our country truthfully, and what was going on. I wonder how many of us are poor representations of the kingdom of God? “Well, I’m young.” No, you have a great opportunity and your whole life is ahead of you. Don’t miss it.
We’re 70 miles south of Chicago Midway airport. It was Monday morning I was outside and I saw a Southwest jet fly over my house low enough that I could recognize the red tail part. That’s how long and low his approach was. That’s a long 70-mile approach coming in. I’ve flown over Dwight, Illinois and could see I-55, but I could never get into position to see my home yet from the sky. We’ve got a long approach going on so hang on!
Number three. I must be willing to do my part as a child of God when it comes to my God-given parents. What is your part? My part according to scripture is where we started. My part is to honor and obey, to look for opportunities to honor my parents. I live with missed opportunity, I live with that, what I did wrong in my younger years. Now I made a commitment after I got right with God that I would never break my mom and dad’s heart again, never ever, and I did my best to be a blessing to my mom and dad from then on.
My dad’s in Heaven now. My dad liked to eat. I’m a foodie, as you can tell. Sometimes I would eat something really good, and I would call my dad and say, “Dad, you won’t believe what I just ate, it was fabulous.” The other day I ate at a place that was really nice and the food was exceptional. I thought, “Man, I need to call my dad, we need to come back here.” Then I realized, “Oh he already knows. He’s been watching, he knows.” But those opportunities are over. I can’t call him anymore.
Young people, some of that is coming for you one day, its going to come to your home where Dad’s not going to be there or Mom’s not going to be there. I need to look for opportunities while it is yet today, opportunities to enjoy them, to be together, to build this relationship with them. Hey I have to look for acts of kindness and things that would be a help and blessing to them. Now there is a warning label with kindness. Be careful showing kindness to your parents because they may pass out and fall and bump their heads because they’ve never seen that out of you before!
Proverbs 31:26 says, “She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.” By the way, that’s not just for women, its for everyone. Ephesians 4:32 says, “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” I wonder, does the law of kindness live in your heart?
I have a way I can identify when someone has a kind spirit, by how they treat animals, how they act towards animals. I can tell when a boy is going to have a hard time in life if he’s mean to an animal. I grew up on a farm milking cows when I was very young, and I have a real love for animals and trained dogs. There’s this law of kindness. Anybody can be kind to a dog. Have you ever thought why dogs are called a man’s best friend? You would think in a husband wife situation the wife would be, and my wife is my best friend. When I say man’s best friend you’ve heard that saying for so long, you automatically think of a dog. Do you know why?
There’s reasons. I’ve thought about this stuff. A dog doesn’t mind if you use its shampoo, he doesn’t care it doesn’t bother him. A dog never asks for directions, there’s an instinct there and he knows where he’s going. A dog doesn’t mind if you leave your stuff around, in fact, the more you lay it around the better he likes it. A dog never gets upset when you bring your friends over, he gets all excited and jumps up and down and jumps on them. You never have to wonder where your dog is, you just chain him to the house.
Now getting back to kindness, young people look for acts of kindness you can do to be a blessing to your mom and dad who have invested so much of themselves in your life. First off, obey them and honor them and don’t be a heartbreak to them. But look for those opportunities of things that would mean a lot to them. Honor your parents. A note, a card, a letter.
Always obey with gladness. This is where you win big points, always obey with gladness. Respond with gladness and a smile when you’re asked to do something. I trained my girls with this statement. When I would ask them to do something, they would have to respond with, “I’ll be glad to!” When I first taught this they would say, “I’LL BE GLAD TOO!” and I would say, “No, no, no. That’s sarcastic” “I’d be glad to.” Ruth Ann was the biggest offender of this, and of course some of it was teasing and horsing around. “I’d be glad to.” I would say “No, no, that’s being a smart-aleck. That’s not right, so say it again.” She had about 30 different ways she would say it. Finally it would come out, “Dad, I would be glad to.” It became a way of life in our home with our girls.
By the way young people, when you have a glad surrender in your heart, then things go much better when you have needs and wants. When you say, “Dad, do you have five bucks?” Seriously, if I’m mad at you then don’t come asking for money, absolutely not! A glad surrender.
Do you understand that one day you will reap what you have sown? Young people, I went to the altar before I had kids and said, “Oh, God forgive me for the way I once acted towards my mom and dad, I don’t want to reap what I’ve sown. Oh God, help me and please forgive me for all their heartache and hurt. Oh, God help me.” Young people, I’m not kidding you. I was afraid I would reap all that, and I would have but for the mercy and forgiveness of God. I confessed my sins at the altar and I haven’t reaped one thing with my girls. They are serving the Lord, thank God.
But the Bible says you will reap what you sow. Not only will you reap what you sow, you will reap more than what you sow. You plant one kernel of corn and you’ll get a whole ear of corn, a whole stalk of ears, its amazing. Not only that, when you plant corn, you don’t get potatoes, you get corn. You don’t plant corn and get tomatoes. You get corn. Disobedience planted, what do you get? Disobedience. You plant smart-aleck attitude and rebellion and what do you get? Smart-aleck rebellion. Not only do you get it back, but you get more.
Don’t miss what I’m saying. There needs to be a glad surrender in your obedience. Not just going through the motions with a poor attitude.
We hear about rebel radar. Rebels have a way of finding each other at camp, at youth activity, at church. I’ve seen it. I was a rebel and I could spot another rebel and gravitate in their direction. I’ve raised horses. Two horses could be put in a pen together for less than an hour and then you try to separate them and they go nuts, like they’ve been friends forever.
But there needs to be a radar set to have mom and dad on the radar. When they call, “Danny!” I don’t yell and say, “What do you want?” No, I go running because they’re on my radar, and ask, “Mom and Dad, what do you need?” I respond to their voice. I hear them and ask, “What can I do for you?” Instead of yelling and asking what they want, instead of saying, “I’m busy, don’t you know I’m busy?” Shame on some of you. When you’ve got mom and dad on the radar it ought to be tuned in to them all the time. No matter what I’m doing, even if I’m busy and it may be an inconvenience at the moment, but boy life is a lot better now that I’ve got mom and dad on the radar.
I learned a lot following my dad around and helping him. I learned about wrenches and tools and how to do things. I’m a mechanic, you wouldn’t believe all the projects I work on and some of the things I do. I would like some of you to keep up with me and all I’ve got going on. But I learned so much of it from my dad. My dad would say, “Go get me a 3/16” or “Go get me a 5/8” and I learned all that.
My mom was a circulating nurse for surgery. The doctor would ask for something and they would hand it to him. Well we would circulate, too. When we work on a vehicle somebody runs to help and to find things so the guy underneath doesn’t have to come out. We get more done working on buses because we have somebody that’s circulating. But how about this radar? Staying in tune with what mom and dad need, looking for an opportunity to be a help and a blessing.
Then think about this, keep your heart thankful. That’s why the Bible says, “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” (I Thessalonians 5:18) Even when they have to say no, keep a good attitude and a thankful heart. “Hey can I...?” “No? Well, thank you anyways.”
No means no. My dad knew body language, my dad was pretty tough. So when I would talk to him I would be careful to make sure my eyes weren’t moving or rolling or doing nothing. I would look him in the eye and say, “Yes sir.”
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.” (Ephesians 6:1-3) Think about this, verse three “That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.” My dad, sometimes when I did something bad he would say, “Son, you’re going to die or you’re going to wish you were dead.” Do you want blessings for your future and long life? The Bible says it’s connected to your relationship with Mom and Dad.
Listen, is it well with thee? Is it well with thee? Last thing and I am done. Make a covenant not to break your mom and dad’s heart. Start today. I’m going to make a covenant, a promise. Listen to me, “Happily Ever After Doesn’t Happen by Accident.” My parents prayed for me, and that’s probably what saved my life and gave me another chance. I put together a plan when I got right with God, a plan to be a blessing to my parents, a plan that I’m going to start obeying the first time. I’m going to look for opportunities to honor them and show my love for them. I’m not going to break my mom and dad’s heart. I’m going to keep them on the radar.
Happily ever after doesn’t happen by accident.