Success in Motherhood!
(Part 3)
by Mrs. Cathy Corle
I made the statement earlier that, in motherhood, obedience is 99% of success, and I still think that’s true when I’m thinking about the subject of obedience. But when I look at this other item, I’m struck by it’s weighty importance, as well. So if I’m anywhere near correct in saying that it’s only one percent of the whole, let me stress that it is a mighty important one percent!
That final penny that makes up the whole dollar of success in motherhood is to add contentment to your complete and faithful obedience. I’m convinced that much of the heartache and tragedy we’re seeing on the homefront today stems from the discontentment and dissatisfaction of American wives and mothers, and more specifically, Christian wives and mothers. We’ve allowed the devil to dangle his pretty package before our noses wrapped in all the world’s shiny glitz and glitter, and we’ve believed him about the contents that await us inside.
But just like Eve found out, you can’t believe the father of lies -- he’ll lie to you every time. The devil will promise you anything that appeals to you, but he never even intends to keep any of the promises that he makes. Why do we keep listening to him?
I’m as sure as I am that my name is Cathy Corle that the devil has carefully orchestrated his plan to project this image of ‘the successful woman’ unceasingly before our eyes, and to constantly tempt and suggest and plant thoughts in our minds to make us think that elusive phantom is exactly what we want to become. Maybe it’s alot like the role-playing games that kids get so addicted to; we want to assume this image and identity and live this ‘charmed existence’ (so the devil would like us to think) of success, prosperity, glamour, freedom, fulfillment, and enjoyment.
My husband led a lady to the Lord on a plane, and was sharing with me all her heartache. She’s in a high-paid executive position and has been for many years. She has everything money can buy. While she’s been making money and climbing the corporate ladder for the last 30 years, her family has spent much of the time without a wife and mother in the home.
Since her husband was much better acquainted with the secretary of his small business who he had spent so much time with while he became more and more a stranger to his own wife, he decided he’d be happier married to the woman he actually lives with the most. The oldest children have already wrecked their lives in the world and gone their own way.
There is one boy still in high school, and constantly bombarded with the rock music, drugs, sex, and gang influence around him every day. She confided in my husband after she got saved that she thought she ought to sell her picture-perfect California home, take a year’s sabbatical from work, and spend this last year with her youngest son before he graduates. The world would laud this woman as a shining example of success and wealth for females everywhere to follow, but I don’t think she would give you the same advice.
The devil will feed you a constant stream of, “You would be happy if...” Let me remind you again that you will only be happy if you unplug your receiving unit to all the lies of the world, the flesh and the devil and decide once and for all that there is absolutely no chance of happiness in following the plan and program they have designed for your life. You will only be happy if you find and follow whole-heartedly the plan that God has for your life.
Blessed, or happy, or approved of God, is the man or woman who shuns the advice of the ungodly, but his or her delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law do they meditate and obey day and night. That word ‘blessed’ in Psalm one means both ‘happy’ and ‘approved of God’. My husband’s sermon well illustrates that only what God approves can make a person happy. So not just success, but also happiness, contentment, and fulfillment are wrapped up in finding the will of God and doing it for a lifetime.
It’s been said that, “Contentment is the art of enjoying what you have.” But for most of the world, it’s a lost art. Most people with a family to treasure don’t see the true value of what they have until they’ve already lost it. Contentment is not found in having everything you want. Contentment equals wanting everything that you have.
We tend to think of contentment only in financial terms, but since the most important things in life can’t be bought with money, we need to widen our scope and look at the value of what we have that doesn’t translate into dollar signs. At Mother’s Day I want to remind ladies, “If you have a mother, you are blessed. If you are a mother, you are very blessed. If you have a mother and are a mother, you are doubly blessed. But if you have the legacy of loving family in your past, a godly marriage and family in your present and the continuing anticipation of close family ties with loving parents, loving husband, and precious children sent from God, their future spouses and children, then you are an immeasurably rich woman.”
Contentment is an important ingredient in success at home. Contentment with our role, with our duties, with our schedule, with our homes and belongings and with our finances. Contentment is actually submission -- saying, “This is what my Heavenly Father chose for me, and I have chosen to be happy with it.” We need to get content with the will of God for us as wives and mothers. We’ve been given the command, “Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.” (Hebrews13:5) When we have the Lord, we have everything.
It’s been said that the best thing you can give to your children is to be madly in love with their daddy, and building your marriage is the foundation for raising your children. Probably the area where Satan works hardest to stir up discontentment is in our marriages. “But I didn’t expect marriage to be like this. I got married expecting love and romance and emotional support and closeness, but look what I got instead!”
Like Eve in the Garden, we’re in danger, because we’re constantly focusing on the one thing that we don’t have, while ignoring all the wonderful things that we do have. Eve had forgotten about all the countless lovely trees and delicious fruits that were available to her because she allowed her attention to focus on the one that God had labeled ‘off-limits.’ How many women have wrecked their marriages and children in the same way? I wonder if there’s a calculator that could count that high?
If you’re having trouble remembering how much you have to be thankful for and content with, then I challenge you to remember that there are lots of women who would be more than happy to have a husband just like yours. Some ladies watch from afar to see a husband that is faithful, that works hard, pays the bills, shoulders the responsibility for the family, that is a good, faithful, honest man of integrity and says, “Wish I had one of those.” If you look at your marriage through the eyes of someone else, you might see that you have a great deal for which to be thankful. It’s imperative to realize that the devil is the one working so hard to keep your eyes off of what you do have and focused on what you don’t have in order to keep you discontented.
Obedience plus enjoyment, which God has labeled “Godliness With Contentment,” is the formula for success in motherhood as well as any other area of life. I’ve spent all my time stressing the importance of doing our job as mothers and being happy in it, instead of really getting into the job description, or God’s commands to wives and mothers. But we’ve gone over that part often in the past, and most of us already have a pretty good idea of what we’re suppose to be doing. I thought we need to concentrate on WHY we should be doing it for a change.
But before we’re done, I do want to inject this thought about a mother’s job. Let’s use the same ‘take-off runway’ as our ‘landing strip.’ Success is finding the will of God and doing it for a lifetime, and that’s just as true for my children as it is for me. Since I firmly believe that God has a purpose for each child, a specific plan for their lives and futures, then my purpose as a mom is to help them find and fulfill that purpose. Throughout their growing up years I can change hats and be coach, cheerleader, guide, medic, counselor and helper in their success so that they can find the will of God for their lives and get started on doing the will of God faithfully for the rest of their lives.
That’s why all the things that we already know are important have such importance in childtraining. Character building, Bible reading, prayer, faithful church attendance, honesty and integrity, obedience. Those are all elements of their success. I can contribute to that success through encouragement, prayer, believing in them, providing godly advice and leadership, and by being an example of obedience to God.
“This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success. Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.” (Joshua 1:8-9) I couldn’t very well attempt to give my thoughts on ‘Success in Motherhood’ without pointing you to the only promise in the Bible that contains the word ‘success.’
Success is inseparably linked to my relationship to the Word of God. We need to get in the Bible, get our children in the Bible, and get the Bible into them. And since ‘the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest,’ then I need to remember that the presence and power of God is available and accessible in my quest for success in this most important endeavor of raising a family.
I told a friend of mine, Loretta Walker, that I spent much of my early years in the ministry as a preacher’s wife and young mother frustrated about ‘success.’ I was on the road, living in an RV, going to church services every evening, schooling my children during the day, and busy, busy, busy. I’d see all these articles and hear all these messages about promised success, and it seemed like such an unattainable prize, always in sight and just beyond my reach. I said, “I stayed so upset with myself that I couldn’t concentrate on SUCCESS when all my time and effort was spent on SURVIVAL, until one day I came to the glorious conclusion that survival IS success. If I survive, then I’ve succeeded!” The day I realized that was a great day for me!
A successful mom is a needmeeter, so she’s flexible, adjusting to needs of her family that are present right now. That will change with toddlers, fifth-graders, sophomores and college age kids. It’s not hitting the ball out of the batting machine at practice, but playing the one that gets pitched to you in the real game that counts! More specifically, it’s not making cookies and changing diapers on a doll in home-ec class, but dealing with a real one that cries and spits up and keeps you awake at night. This is the real thing, and it doesn’t always line up with the organized schedule that you planned or the list of do’s and don’ts that you copied down in someone’s class.
Though we’re given the same basic guidelines and commands, every mom’s job is as unique and individual as her husband and children, and their ministry or circumstances. We do ourselves a favor when we learn to expect the unexpected and do the best we can at present with what and who we have to deal with right now. “What does the Lord want me to do right now in this situation, and which one of these needs is the first priority?” It’s a constantly changing, adjusting, evaluating process, but hey, that’s why management is such a high-paying career!
By the way, success has its rewards. Motherhood is the highest paying career in the world, but it doesn’t compute in dollars and cents. “Her children rise up and call her blessed.” God has designed every realm of life so that, when you give your best, you’ll receive God’s best. What could be a more appropriate reward for a dedicated mother than deep and abiding love from those you love the most. Honor and a special place in the hearts of the most important people in the world to you. Blessings innumerable that multiply day by day. Children whose lives you are proud of and who will continue to be the nearest and dearest friends of our lives. That sounds like a paycheck worth pursuing!
I said at the beginning that we don’t have the luxury of failure and starting over in motherhood. That seems to leave me in a frightening position, but I have some good news. “For we are labourers together with God...” in our life’s work as a mother, just as in soulwinning or any other important endeavor that God commands and calls us to fulfill. I find some relief in being the ‘Junior Partner,’ and knowing that God is really the One in charge here, since He has all the wisdom I lack, and He has the power and ability and opportunity to correct some of my mistakes, as well.
In doing the work God calls you to, it’s important to do it in His power, in cooperation with His Holy Spirit, following His guidance, working in His strength. I’m not suppose to do God’s will by following my own plan and doing things my own way. Paul commented on his service to God by saying, “Whereunto I also labour, striving according to his working, which worketh in me mightily.” (Colossians 1:29) I need to get in cooperation with the Lord since it’s His work and His will that I’m trying to accomplish anyway!
I already know I can’t do it on my own. I’ve proven my own ability for failure over and over again. Even in the area of motherhood, I’ve found myself on my face before God many times crying out for His intervention to compensate for my inability and stupidity. My safety net for success has become the marriage of John 15:5 and Philippians 4:13! “...Without me ye can do nothing” but “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”
If we’ll obey, and be content, and work together in cooperation with the Lord, and try to the best of our ability to raise our children GOD’s way, being the kind of Christian mother God wants them to have WE CANNOT FAIL. As is true in any endeavor, I must work like everything depends on me, and pray like everything depends on God.
I’ve had many experiences of fear and trepidation over whether or not I’ll be a success in motherhood, but I’ve decided to wait until the judgment seat of Christ instead of putting a label on myself today! At the time of writing this message, my children are not yet grown, and have not yet made all of their life’s decisions. When you’ve invested as much of your life in them as you must in order to be a mother, then that’s a scary thing, knowing that they can use their free will to go the wrong way and break your heart.
But I’m excited about the promises of God that we’ve looked at, and I’m more encouraged than ever before (only because the Lord promised and can’t fail) that success in motherhood is attainable, even for me! Though you might not have realized it, I’ve just been ‘encouraging myself in the Lord,’ and letting you come along for the ride! I hope that something I’ve said in this long conversation I’ve been having with myself will be just the thing to encourage your heart today, as well.
Though it’s a far cry from the world’s image of success, all of God’s promises of triumph and victory are available and powerful for us today, even those of us who are named ‘Mom.’ By following His instructions, praying for His guidance, acting in His power, and loving our families with His limitless ‘agape’ love, we can and WILL attain that goal of Success In Motherhood.
That final penny that makes up the whole dollar of success in motherhood is to add contentment to your complete and faithful obedience. I’m convinced that much of the heartache and tragedy we’re seeing on the homefront today stems from the discontentment and dissatisfaction of American wives and mothers, and more specifically, Christian wives and mothers. We’ve allowed the devil to dangle his pretty package before our noses wrapped in all the world’s shiny glitz and glitter, and we’ve believed him about the contents that await us inside.
But just like Eve found out, you can’t believe the father of lies -- he’ll lie to you every time. The devil will promise you anything that appeals to you, but he never even intends to keep any of the promises that he makes. Why do we keep listening to him?
I’m as sure as I am that my name is Cathy Corle that the devil has carefully orchestrated his plan to project this image of ‘the successful woman’ unceasingly before our eyes, and to constantly tempt and suggest and plant thoughts in our minds to make us think that elusive phantom is exactly what we want to become. Maybe it’s alot like the role-playing games that kids get so addicted to; we want to assume this image and identity and live this ‘charmed existence’ (so the devil would like us to think) of success, prosperity, glamour, freedom, fulfillment, and enjoyment.
My husband led a lady to the Lord on a plane, and was sharing with me all her heartache. She’s in a high-paid executive position and has been for many years. She has everything money can buy. While she’s been making money and climbing the corporate ladder for the last 30 years, her family has spent much of the time without a wife and mother in the home.
Since her husband was much better acquainted with the secretary of his small business who he had spent so much time with while he became more and more a stranger to his own wife, he decided he’d be happier married to the woman he actually lives with the most. The oldest children have already wrecked their lives in the world and gone their own way.
There is one boy still in high school, and constantly bombarded with the rock music, drugs, sex, and gang influence around him every day. She confided in my husband after she got saved that she thought she ought to sell her picture-perfect California home, take a year’s sabbatical from work, and spend this last year with her youngest son before he graduates. The world would laud this woman as a shining example of success and wealth for females everywhere to follow, but I don’t think she would give you the same advice.
The devil will feed you a constant stream of, “You would be happy if...” Let me remind you again that you will only be happy if you unplug your receiving unit to all the lies of the world, the flesh and the devil and decide once and for all that there is absolutely no chance of happiness in following the plan and program they have designed for your life. You will only be happy if you find and follow whole-heartedly the plan that God has for your life.
Blessed, or happy, or approved of God, is the man or woman who shuns the advice of the ungodly, but his or her delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law do they meditate and obey day and night. That word ‘blessed’ in Psalm one means both ‘happy’ and ‘approved of God’. My husband’s sermon well illustrates that only what God approves can make a person happy. So not just success, but also happiness, contentment, and fulfillment are wrapped up in finding the will of God and doing it for a lifetime.
It’s been said that, “Contentment is the art of enjoying what you have.” But for most of the world, it’s a lost art. Most people with a family to treasure don’t see the true value of what they have until they’ve already lost it. Contentment is not found in having everything you want. Contentment equals wanting everything that you have.
We tend to think of contentment only in financial terms, but since the most important things in life can’t be bought with money, we need to widen our scope and look at the value of what we have that doesn’t translate into dollar signs. At Mother’s Day I want to remind ladies, “If you have a mother, you are blessed. If you are a mother, you are very blessed. If you have a mother and are a mother, you are doubly blessed. But if you have the legacy of loving family in your past, a godly marriage and family in your present and the continuing anticipation of close family ties with loving parents, loving husband, and precious children sent from God, their future spouses and children, then you are an immeasurably rich woman.”
Contentment is an important ingredient in success at home. Contentment with our role, with our duties, with our schedule, with our homes and belongings and with our finances. Contentment is actually submission -- saying, “This is what my Heavenly Father chose for me, and I have chosen to be happy with it.” We need to get content with the will of God for us as wives and mothers. We’ve been given the command, “Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.” (Hebrews13:5) When we have the Lord, we have everything.
It’s been said that the best thing you can give to your children is to be madly in love with their daddy, and building your marriage is the foundation for raising your children. Probably the area where Satan works hardest to stir up discontentment is in our marriages. “But I didn’t expect marriage to be like this. I got married expecting love and romance and emotional support and closeness, but look what I got instead!”
Like Eve in the Garden, we’re in danger, because we’re constantly focusing on the one thing that we don’t have, while ignoring all the wonderful things that we do have. Eve had forgotten about all the countless lovely trees and delicious fruits that were available to her because she allowed her attention to focus on the one that God had labeled ‘off-limits.’ How many women have wrecked their marriages and children in the same way? I wonder if there’s a calculator that could count that high?
If you’re having trouble remembering how much you have to be thankful for and content with, then I challenge you to remember that there are lots of women who would be more than happy to have a husband just like yours. Some ladies watch from afar to see a husband that is faithful, that works hard, pays the bills, shoulders the responsibility for the family, that is a good, faithful, honest man of integrity and says, “Wish I had one of those.” If you look at your marriage through the eyes of someone else, you might see that you have a great deal for which to be thankful. It’s imperative to realize that the devil is the one working so hard to keep your eyes off of what you do have and focused on what you don’t have in order to keep you discontented.
Obedience plus enjoyment, which God has labeled “Godliness With Contentment,” is the formula for success in motherhood as well as any other area of life. I’ve spent all my time stressing the importance of doing our job as mothers and being happy in it, instead of really getting into the job description, or God’s commands to wives and mothers. But we’ve gone over that part often in the past, and most of us already have a pretty good idea of what we’re suppose to be doing. I thought we need to concentrate on WHY we should be doing it for a change.
But before we’re done, I do want to inject this thought about a mother’s job. Let’s use the same ‘take-off runway’ as our ‘landing strip.’ Success is finding the will of God and doing it for a lifetime, and that’s just as true for my children as it is for me. Since I firmly believe that God has a purpose for each child, a specific plan for their lives and futures, then my purpose as a mom is to help them find and fulfill that purpose. Throughout their growing up years I can change hats and be coach, cheerleader, guide, medic, counselor and helper in their success so that they can find the will of God for their lives and get started on doing the will of God faithfully for the rest of their lives.
That’s why all the things that we already know are important have such importance in childtraining. Character building, Bible reading, prayer, faithful church attendance, honesty and integrity, obedience. Those are all elements of their success. I can contribute to that success through encouragement, prayer, believing in them, providing godly advice and leadership, and by being an example of obedience to God.
“This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success. Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.” (Joshua 1:8-9) I couldn’t very well attempt to give my thoughts on ‘Success in Motherhood’ without pointing you to the only promise in the Bible that contains the word ‘success.’
Success is inseparably linked to my relationship to the Word of God. We need to get in the Bible, get our children in the Bible, and get the Bible into them. And since ‘the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest,’ then I need to remember that the presence and power of God is available and accessible in my quest for success in this most important endeavor of raising a family.
I told a friend of mine, Loretta Walker, that I spent much of my early years in the ministry as a preacher’s wife and young mother frustrated about ‘success.’ I was on the road, living in an RV, going to church services every evening, schooling my children during the day, and busy, busy, busy. I’d see all these articles and hear all these messages about promised success, and it seemed like such an unattainable prize, always in sight and just beyond my reach. I said, “I stayed so upset with myself that I couldn’t concentrate on SUCCESS when all my time and effort was spent on SURVIVAL, until one day I came to the glorious conclusion that survival IS success. If I survive, then I’ve succeeded!” The day I realized that was a great day for me!
A successful mom is a needmeeter, so she’s flexible, adjusting to needs of her family that are present right now. That will change with toddlers, fifth-graders, sophomores and college age kids. It’s not hitting the ball out of the batting machine at practice, but playing the one that gets pitched to you in the real game that counts! More specifically, it’s not making cookies and changing diapers on a doll in home-ec class, but dealing with a real one that cries and spits up and keeps you awake at night. This is the real thing, and it doesn’t always line up with the organized schedule that you planned or the list of do’s and don’ts that you copied down in someone’s class.
Though we’re given the same basic guidelines and commands, every mom’s job is as unique and individual as her husband and children, and their ministry or circumstances. We do ourselves a favor when we learn to expect the unexpected and do the best we can at present with what and who we have to deal with right now. “What does the Lord want me to do right now in this situation, and which one of these needs is the first priority?” It’s a constantly changing, adjusting, evaluating process, but hey, that’s why management is such a high-paying career!
By the way, success has its rewards. Motherhood is the highest paying career in the world, but it doesn’t compute in dollars and cents. “Her children rise up and call her blessed.” God has designed every realm of life so that, when you give your best, you’ll receive God’s best. What could be a more appropriate reward for a dedicated mother than deep and abiding love from those you love the most. Honor and a special place in the hearts of the most important people in the world to you. Blessings innumerable that multiply day by day. Children whose lives you are proud of and who will continue to be the nearest and dearest friends of our lives. That sounds like a paycheck worth pursuing!
I said at the beginning that we don’t have the luxury of failure and starting over in motherhood. That seems to leave me in a frightening position, but I have some good news. “For we are labourers together with God...” in our life’s work as a mother, just as in soulwinning or any other important endeavor that God commands and calls us to fulfill. I find some relief in being the ‘Junior Partner,’ and knowing that God is really the One in charge here, since He has all the wisdom I lack, and He has the power and ability and opportunity to correct some of my mistakes, as well.
In doing the work God calls you to, it’s important to do it in His power, in cooperation with His Holy Spirit, following His guidance, working in His strength. I’m not suppose to do God’s will by following my own plan and doing things my own way. Paul commented on his service to God by saying, “Whereunto I also labour, striving according to his working, which worketh in me mightily.” (Colossians 1:29) I need to get in cooperation with the Lord since it’s His work and His will that I’m trying to accomplish anyway!
I already know I can’t do it on my own. I’ve proven my own ability for failure over and over again. Even in the area of motherhood, I’ve found myself on my face before God many times crying out for His intervention to compensate for my inability and stupidity. My safety net for success has become the marriage of John 15:5 and Philippians 4:13! “...Without me ye can do nothing” but “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”
If we’ll obey, and be content, and work together in cooperation with the Lord, and try to the best of our ability to raise our children GOD’s way, being the kind of Christian mother God wants them to have WE CANNOT FAIL. As is true in any endeavor, I must work like everything depends on me, and pray like everything depends on God.
I’ve had many experiences of fear and trepidation over whether or not I’ll be a success in motherhood, but I’ve decided to wait until the judgment seat of Christ instead of putting a label on myself today! At the time of writing this message, my children are not yet grown, and have not yet made all of their life’s decisions. When you’ve invested as much of your life in them as you must in order to be a mother, then that’s a scary thing, knowing that they can use their free will to go the wrong way and break your heart.
But I’m excited about the promises of God that we’ve looked at, and I’m more encouraged than ever before (only because the Lord promised and can’t fail) that success in motherhood is attainable, even for me! Though you might not have realized it, I’ve just been ‘encouraging myself in the Lord,’ and letting you come along for the ride! I hope that something I’ve said in this long conversation I’ve been having with myself will be just the thing to encourage your heart today, as well.
Though it’s a far cry from the world’s image of success, all of God’s promises of triumph and victory are available and powerful for us today, even those of us who are named ‘Mom.’ By following His instructions, praying for His guidance, acting in His power, and loving our families with His limitless ‘agape’ love, we can and WILL attain that goal of Success In Motherhood.